It's messed up

well, these days I just feel that the world isnt the same way,like it was. I used to laugh freely and happy for no reason everytime I met my old friends. But, around these days, it's so hard to make a smile around my face and pretend that nothing happens while you're surrounded by some hard feeling that couldnt be described, it 's feel like anxiety,nervous, scared at the same time but you just hide it to make it ok. Well, I just want some sleeps for 2 weeks, dont want to go to some places,or meet someone new and introduce urself as someone that fine. No, Im not that fine, im not that ok, Im sick. I dont care what other people saying, i just need some time for healing myself, I want to go out to the place where is I expect the total silence, so I can make a healing by myself, I dont need someone else to take part, yet I also need someone so I just remind myself that I'm not alone. It's complicated.